For a while now, singlehood has been an emerging trend. Women are choosing to stay single, and boyfriends are officially “embarrassing,” circa Vogue 2025. And yet, as a chronically single 20-something, I am constantly told to try “online dating”, as though it is the miracle answer-all drug.
Well, online dating is definitely not the answer. The pro of having another app to doomscroll does not outweigh the con of being on it.
Online dating feels less like dating and more like digital shopping. It’s pretty similar to how the same design can be found in both Zara and H&M; the same guy can be spotted—just with different heights and in different neighbourhoods. It’s more of the same, just in a different font. The angular beard remains the same, though.
Like Instagram trends, dating app bios also follow a pattern: a dog pic, a sunset/mountain pic, a gym pic (obviously), a goofy pic, one with your mom, and one partying, you know, so we all know you’re cool.
From ChatGPT prompts to “would you like to have a deep, meaningful conversation?”, the Hinge bros need a revamp. (Side note: what even is a “deep, meaningful conversation”?)
Also read: The rise of Hijabi influencers. They don’t need your rescuing
Searching for Halal baddies?
But as bad as most Hinge stories go, I doubt anything can beat being a Muslim on it. And no, for once it is not the obvious communalism of it all. Frankly, it’s worse.
“Qubool hai, qubool hai, qubool hai” messages to being called a “halal baddie”—why is a girl on a dating app immediately brought down to only her religious identity?
If the boy is Muslim, then the messages will start with a ‘salam’ and include the sheer serendipity of your shared religion. But if the boy is not Muslim, then the messages will include phrases such as “abba nahi mane gain? (father won’t agree?)”, “saw your profile, going to offer fajr namaz” (it was 12 in the afternoon, but ok), and “oh no, you are Muslim.”
At this point, even Bridget Jones would agree: being single is better.
But this is something most Muslim women on dating apps face. The constant shock at being on one and the absurd benign communalism.
Even if one filters through the rather sparse crop, the conversation eventually fizzles out.
Men are so used to the chase that they forget to actually build a connection. ChatGPT prompts to keep a conversation going are no longer enough. A miracle is needed.
No, this isn’t a hit piece on men (maybe it is). But men now are far more precious and precocious than women. There are no butterflies anymore; they starved to death while you were looking for “deep, meaningful conversations”.
PS: This article is based on empirical experience.
Views are personal.
(Edited by Saptak Datta)