New Delhi: New Zealand expatriate Paula Simpson sparked a conversation online after questioning the amount of work involved in daily life in India, particularly the additional household chores that accompany everyday living.
“Why is India so much hard work?” asked Paula Simpson, beginning her lengthy LinkedIn post comparing life in the two countries.
In her detailed post, Simpson reflected on the amount of cooking, cleaning, managing staff, shopping, driving and the general chaos that make daily life in India exhausting, with work seemingly stretching throughout the day.
“The noise is exhausting, even if you don’t notice it…Every day for the past week, some guy plays loudspeaker music and screams into a microphone for hours- I assume a local school. Horns. Traffic. It’s overwhelming. Houses are not insulated for sound,” she wrote, while listing the harmful effects of continuous noise exposure: chronic stress responses releasing stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, which she argued leads to high blood pressure, increased heart rate, sleep disruption, and cardiovascular strain over time.
Her comments came after she watched a reel by an Indian expatriate living in the United States, who said that she cooked, cleaned and drove herself but still had more free time than she had while living in India.
“I’ve wondered myself,” Simpson wrote, questioning why life in India can demand so much time and effort despite the availability of domestic help and other conveniences.
“Cooking expectations here are higher. Three cooked meals a day, leftovers are refused by some and fresh food demanded for each meal. The meals are elaborate,” she wrote, pointing to the familiar Indian breakfast, masala dosa, to illustrate her point.
“Even to make a masala dosa you need to do the aloo masala, a chutney, a sambhar, and the dosa. FOUR DISHES for a breakfast the kids still complain about. Even quick snacks like a chai and pakoda are time consuming to make.”
In her comparison, Simpson further wrote about the lengthy cleaning process in India, the chaos of driving and how everyday travel can consume a significant portion of the day. She also challenged the assumption that having household staff necessarily reduces the workload, saying they still need to be managed because “they cannot possibly read your mind”.
“When I see Indians reluctant to move overseas because they can’t afford staff there, I encourage them. It’s NOT that much work. Yet it deters many women from wanting to leave,” she ended her post.
Personal journey
A day after her post, Simpson received a mixed reaction on social media. Some criticised her post, while many others discussed Indian culture and agreed with her observations.
“I have never stayed abroad, only travelled. But the part about being permanently exhausted here is so true. Something or the other will disturb your peace,” said one user on LinkedIn.
“I have a slightly different view… For people in India, food is still central. In all festivals, food is something that holds everyone together, and that has been our culture,” said another user in his long comment discussing the food culture of India.
“India is a big country with its own share of problems, and wins. I would not justify the concerns but it does not seem ideal to put 1.4 billion people in the stereotype of ‘chaotic people’ because that sounds disrespectful and naive”, said another user showing disagreement with Simpson’s post. “We are also one of the most hospitable people, with communities serving free food to the needy around us,( even when abroad) etc. India can be hard work, it’s still a home to many and home is always beautiful”.
Follow-up post
The following day, Simpson returned to LinkedIn with a more personal post—this time introducing herself and her family and offering an inside glimpse into her life in India.
“I went a bit viral yesterday. And not in a feverish way. In the internet way,” Simpson wrote, before sharing more about who she is and how she came to live in India.
Her journey with India began in 2016, when a friend offered her a business opportunity after she went through a difficult personal phase. Although the venture failed, Simpson said the experience made her fall in love with India.
“The business failed but in the interim, I had realised India was incredible and I wasn’t done here quite yet.”
She later met Mohamed Reza, whom she married, and the couple now run NeonTrumpet, a B2B product marketing company. They also have a five-year-old son.
“We like coffee, reminscing about the glory days of travelling together, and although it has a number of challenges, we mostly enjoy working together,” she wrote.
Simpson said her life in India has grown beyond work, with both her business and family becoming deeply connected to the country.
“Almost a decade on, I’m still here,” she said, adding that despite raising concerns about the demands of everyday life in India, she still loves the country and has chosen to stay.
“I still love India. I could leave if I wanted. But I don’t because for now, it’s where we want to be. My heart is split across two countries and it’ll always be that way. And, that’s OK,” she concluded her post.
(Edited by Prashant Dixit)