Would you rather be stuck in a forest with a man or a bear? Women have chosen the bear. A TikTok video where this question was posed to eight women, seven of whom picked the bear, has spawned reactions, memes—and pushback from men.
It’s reignited conversations on safety and gender-based violence. It’s a hypothetical situation, a thought experiment of sorts, but the responses are a reflection of the reality of women all over the world. We’d rather be stuck with a bear with teeth and claws than with a man.
After the original video went viral and migrated to other platforms like X, Facebook and Instagram, women started coming out to share their experiences of harassment and abuse by men. It set off a counterattack by men who either dismissed or criticised the trend.
Now, more women have joined in. It’s an invisible bond forged on the internet with women not just sharing the original video or its screenshot but weighing in on a society where women are almost always forced to be alert in the interest of their safety.
Understand the point
A woman who hikes frequently, and has actually encountered bears in the wild, pointed out that she has never felt threatened by one. But the same cannot be said for encounters with men in the wild.
found this little gem for you – pic.twitter.com/mJfIGjJ7If
— TheKathyOke (@TheKathyOke) May 3, 2024
Another highlighted the point of women’s answers–bears are more predictable than men, and would just go to the extent of killing a person. A man, though, could do far, far worse.
So men are not understanding why women would prefer to meet a bear in the woods rather than a man. Listen and really soak this in. The WORST thing a bear can do is kill me. I can not say the same about the man.
— jessica 🍉 (@ItsMrsRabbitToU) April 26, 2024
Men, too, have started weighing in on this question. Of course, they’ve taken offence, but everything they’ve said in their defence so far has only solidified the choice made by women.
A few enlightened male social media users started explaining – or rather mansplaining – to women how they don’t understand how dangerous bears are in real life because they have probably never watched a single nature documentary.
They’ve missed the point by a mile. The responses were never meant to be literal. The point is that the potential outcome of a bear attack is still less frightening than what a man could do. At least a bear will leave you alone if you play dead.
Men can’t take no for an answer
The rise of ‘Not all men’ in response to the trend only shows that they would rather defend each other than speak out against gender-based violence.
Stop using the man vs. bear test to guilt trip good, protective men who aren't naive to the dangers of the world. You're accomplishing nothing but psychological abuse all for the sake of keeping up with the latest viral trends. Your husband/bf is not your social experiment.
— Shane Jones (@revsjones718) May 6, 2024
One user called out feminists for making their husbands/partners part of a ‘social experiment’ for the sake of keeping up with trends.
Many resorted to giving lessons on wilderness survival and bear attacks. One Facebook user made a meme depicting a woman being attacked by a bear right after she chose it, while another took it up a notch and made a joke about women’s choice of bears being a sexual kink.
This is cyberbullying. Even in a question that emphasises gender-based violence, men cannot take no for an answer.
A few good others, however, decided to take this opportunity to highlight how sexual violence against women is a very real problem.
The reasons he shared are heartbreaking because this is what the "bear vs man" discussion is actually about. Violence against women.
One thing I'm seeing more & more come from this "man vs bear" discussion is more & more men standing up to highlight that this discussion is about… pic.twitter.com/rht0bMUvbL
— Miranda (@DoomScroling) May 4, 2024
But they were the absolute exceptions.
Men must take a step back and reevaluate how unsafe women must feel around them to choose a wild animal. For women, the bottom line is this—bears are unpredictable, you may escape unscathed, but men are predictable. Period.
Views are personal.
(Edited by Zoya Bhatti)