Women can’t drive saala has been the default setting on Indian roads since time immemorial. Of course, it has been set by Indian men, who feel that driving cars or riding bikes or any form of mobility is their fiefdom. They view a woman behind the wheel not just as an intruder in their territory but almost as an unnatural phenomenon.
Despite video evidence clearly showing Kalyan Bainsla cutting across three lanes to his left, deliberately ramming into Sia’s bike, a section of men online are questioning the injured biker’s riding skills. While a few are accusing her of rash driving, others are blaming her, saying, “Isn’t it also your responsibility to obey traffic rules” and “it takes two to tango.”
If anything, this is a testament to the fact that male drivers are ready to push through any limits to protect their fragile little ego, even if it comes at the cost of causing actual physical harm to the other.
Lewd remarks to tailgating
I learnt to drive in Delhi and have been driving for the last 15 years. Expectedly, nothing has changed in how men view women drivers: we are at the bottom of the rung, lowest of lows, worse than (male) learners. This was also the case when my mother learnt driving in the late 1990s. And while we learnt it to have a safer, more independent mode of transport as working professionals, we weren’t told that it comes with its own set of hazards. We are still learning to navigate them.
One thing is common among all male drivers. They cannot tolerate a woman overtaking them, even if it happens by the book. If you overtake them, they will come back for you. They will either blind you with their dipper lights or overtake from the wrong side, roll down the window, and say those golden words: “Nahi aati to kyu chalati ho? (If you can’t, then why do you drive?)”
At that time, it wouldn’t matter that you passed your test and got your license, or that you followed the rules. In all likelihood, the male driver was chugging beer with his bros, enjoying Delhi’s popular car-o-bar culture. You not only interrupted his joy but belittled him in front of his bros by being a stickler for rules. Naturally, he needs to earn it back by flexing his authority over his territory. And this flex has a range — from lewd remarks to tailgating to stalking you till your home.
Remember the 2017 Varnika Kundu case. Then 29-year-old Varnika Kundu was driving at night in Chandigarh when she was stalked, harassed and tailgated by Vikas Barala, son of then Haryana BJP chief Subhash Barala.
In fact, in the last five years, most drivers in high-profile hit-and-run cases have been men — be it the 2023 Kanjhawala case in Delhi, or the Mumbai BMW hit-and-run case, or the 2024 Porsche case in Pune. Except for the Nagpur Ram Jhula case, where a woman was accused of driving a Mercedes that hit a two-wheeler and killed two men.
This is not limited to hit-and-run cases. In your own experience, and be honest, how many times have you seen a woman driver jumping a signal, or wrong-side driving, or revelling in a car-o-bar while driving? Can you even imagine the reverse playing out: If Kalyan was riding and Sia cut across three lanes to “pinch” his bike?
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Curious case of driving in India
Driving in India has undergone a curious effect: the law has been progressive from the outset, unlike Saudi Arabia, where women were legally barred from driving until 2018, but social attitudes are still deeply regressive.
Usually, the law leads to social change and, over time, helps normalise it. But when it comes to women driving in India, the law has long been ahead of the mindset of most Indian men. It’s as if men are unwilling to relinquish their self-proclaimed fiefdom, still clinging to the toys they believe are symbols of their masculinity.
Unfortunately, women have learnt to ignore it to survive it for way too long. That Varnika Kundu and Sia chose to fight back and expose the entitlement and hostility of male drivers is a welcome change — one that will push more women to reclaim roads and refuse to be driven off them.
(Edited by Saptak Datta)