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South Asia region is said to have the world’s highest hunger level and as per The Economic Times news piece of 16 Oct 2022 and India ranks 107 out of 121 countries in the Global Hunger Index 2022. The GHI score indicates that the level of hunger is serious. As much as we would like to deny this ‘unpalatable’ reality , the fact is that this vast economic disparity is evident in almost every sphere of our routine existence. One such glaring display of disparity is our nuptials belying these statistics. Most weddings today have moved from being a “marriage ceremony” to a “marriage event”. Today, we have endless discussions for days on end, months before the wedding on the colour scheme, the couturier outfits, the wide array of dishes ranging from Italian and French to middle Eastern, Indian to Thai and Chinese. And, when it comes to desserts, one chooses to turn a blind eye to the silent killers like hypertension, diabetes and the rising urban obesity. The fun and merrymaking of today’s marriages concomitant with various parallel events also points to a subtle competitiveness between parents trying to match their peers in terms of wealth and fortune. The outlandish display of wealth and buying power, undoubtedly has a positive economic impact too. They create employment opportunities for various service providers like event management companies and catering services. The return gift ‘obsession’ for the already well- heeled guests gives a boost to consumerism and creates a niche market.
The marriage ‘event’, as I would like to refer to it, is the culmination of months of meticulous planning fraught with unending debates bordering on arguments, on the right choice of venue, attire, accessories, menu and many more. Amusing moments indeed and more so, when the socio-economic status of relatives is accentuated while assigning a luxury or a budget hotel or the type of room! Amidst all this however, I have seldom heard discussions on what we must gift the chauffeur, the house helps or the gardener who serve us every day in ways that are priceless. The upwardly mobile strata of society that take foreign holidays or study and work abroad, in the first world countries, surely are aware of the dignity of labour accorded to domestic services such as cooking, cleaning and housekeeping in those countries. In fact, most like to engage a weekly service against exorbitant charges. Strangely, most of us are guilty of underpaying when in our own motherland for the same services and that too for non- mechanised, manual labour. This is perhaps due to the disparate demand- supply ratio in the country. In my opinion, everything need not be seen through the prism of economics and statistics only. Emotional quotient and the ability to empathize are qualities, mostly found wanting during these social mega events.
Happiness shared is joy multiplied. To me, celebrations and happy occasions must be inclusive. Just a fraction of what we spend on gifts and souvenirs for our affluent friends or relatives and which may get ‘passed-on’ eventually, over a period of time can make a big difference to the quality of life of those who render invaluable service to us every day; a long- awaited smartphone for their child for online tuitions, a bicycle or even a one- time life insurance or health insurance premium, help in improving their lot. When visitors from other nations come to the aid of our ‘not so fortunate’ fellow citizens, we look at them either with admiration or mistrust of having a vested interest. All the more reason for us to be more sensitive towards our own. Moreover, we are succumbing to the “created needs” of the entrepreneurial market like sending out high calories’ sweetmeat boxes, fancy sugar free sweets, dry fruit sweets and ‘exotic’ chocolates and savouries along with the invitation itself; strangely making us pretend that our net worth is comparable to that of Big B or King K.
Donating to old age homes, orphanages, animal shelters, night shelters or similar institutions during happy family occasions spread a lot of joy and add a meaningful direction towards a noble cause. We are a proud nation and we take pride in being self-reliant and progressive. We are also working towards indigenization in various spheres of modernization. Various business houses are contributing towards human resources development, health and education through their Corporate Social Responsibility measures. However, at the individual level, each one of us must strive to alleviate poverty and bridge the gaping gap by little gestures of empathy and compassion. The fun filled and happy times of a big fat Indian wedding end up being otiose if not inclusive. It is really quite simple to make them memorable for everyone with a miniscule mindset change.
Views are personal.
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