Maybe the only way to truly police Indian men’s behaviour is to have their mothers accompany them on every trip. Should they want to approach a stranger, they must ask mummy first.
RBI data shows 26 states and Union Territories couldn’t regain pre-pandemic foreign tourist footfalls in 2024, but domestic tourism surged 27 percent compared to 2019.
Why should local communities suffer in order to facilitate someone else’s adventures? The trickle-down effects of over-tourism reach the economy, society, and industry.
India’s pilgrimage business is booming, with choppers for the rich and dorm beds for the poor. But the days of wooing foreigners to the Taj, Jaisalmer, and Palace on Wheels are over.
Around 60 families in Kanpur—most of them newly married couples—have cancelled their planned trips to Kashmir. Pune, Haryana, Chandigarh are all witnessing a wave of cancellations.
Over the last decade, we have begun to take the stand that even if foreign travellers do not want to come, we don’t really care. Even Indians are increasingly avoiding our tourist destinations.
The Nainital littering incident shows that many tourists can’t manage the simple act of putting their rubbish where it belongs. Their trash is a signature that reads—‘tourists were here’
Two months earlier, Dubai created a five-year, multiple-entry tourist visa tailored to Indian visitors. South Africa’s simplified visa scheme will also start in 2025.
Racism is a problem for privileged mainlanders only when it's meted out to them abroad. In their own backyard, it's normalised as 'I was just kidding. Chill yaar'.
The 7 February incident involving Tejas aircraft caused severe damage to its frame. IAF and HAL are working together as part of the Board of Inquiry (BoI) to probe the incident.
It was hyper-courageous to take on this serious issue and get it out there – kudos.
I could sense your helpless rage – barely suppressed – through the rather emotional delivery.
I share your great rage. But I have also felt deep embarrassment, and humiliation seeing my fellow Indian men behave so. Everywhere we go – in India or abroad – we (I say “we” ☹) lech, harass, and often molest women. Indian women, I would say, are largely well-behaved and so amazing and cultured…so the “gender” contrast is striking and frankly horrifying.
This behavior cuts across regions as you observe, but also age, religion, socio-economic class, and education levels. I don’t see educated, polished, “less crass men” from the cities behave any better. I see well-to-do “educated” men in their 40s and 50s sometimes stare at each other’s teenage daughters and wives and pass lewd comments. Indian men are behaving badly with women, at home and in public, in India and abroad – some are just smoother and get away with it – others from the hinterlands just appear crasser. It is so terrible to see foreign tourists harassed this way – we seem to have buried the rubric from our tradition.
Even in neighboring Nepal, Bhutan and Sri Lanka, I have seen men behave in a dignified and respectful way towards women.
Growing up, we have been taught to value, cherish, and protect women – but our behavior is quite the opposite, thus very paradoxical. We are the one unique culture that elevates the Mother above Father, Guru and God . My KV school pledge used to have “all Indians are my brothers and sisters”, and we boys used to mutter “except one” at the end! We propitiate many goddesses in ritual, celebrate them in many festivals, seek their blessings in our pursuits of education, wealth, the arts, power and more. Each Indian man knows that his life would be empty and purposeless without women – mothers, sisters, wives, daughters – as it their affection, love and effort that raises and sustains us….yet…..
I will observe that though men from western countries “seem” to be more respectful externally, they do treat women as disposable objects of their fancy and lust – use, throw, and cheat. It is just that western women give it back in kind. So, I would argue the western male’s abuse is more in the private spaces, than public. [I lived in the US for a decade, and hence noting from that experience and long-time social connect]
I think our Indian men have gotten worse – since I have been watching the world – growing up in the 80s in Madras. The pervasive availability of porn on mobile phones, for one, is distorting and wrecking the psyches of young teenage boys across villages and cities – who have all the potential to be respectful cultured men if spared of such terrible content. Same with OTT – both Indian and abroad – which serve copious amounts promiscuity, and goad the young adolescent male towards “sensual pleasure maximization through any means” as the only purpose in life. Add to that all the globalization, crass consumerism and free-flowing drugs and alcohol….and very soon Indian men have become largely de-sensitized to how a girl or woman might feel if treated the way we do.
I have been a liberal all my life but have gravitated more towards the center in my social worldview. I am for individual Rights and freedoms, but Duties towards our fellow humans, society and nature are equally important. Unless some personal freedoms are restricted and severe punishment is enforced (like many you propose), I don’t see the situation changing.
It was hyper-courageous to take on this serious issue and get it out there – kudos.
I could sense your helpless rage – barely suppressed – through the rather emotional delivery.
I share your great rage. But I have also felt deep embarrassment, and humiliation seeing my fellow Indian men behave so. Everywhere we go – in India or abroad – we (I say “we” ☹) lech, harass, and often molest women. Indian women, I would say, are largely well-behaved and so amazing and cultured…so the “gender” contrast is striking and frankly horrifying.
This behavior cuts across regions as you observe, but also age, religion, socio-economic class, and education levels. I don’t see educated, polished, “less crass men” from the cities behave any better. I see well-to-do “educated” men in their 40s and 50s sometimes stare at each other’s teenage daughters and wives and pass lewd comments. Indian men are behaving badly with women, at home and in public, in India and abroad – some are just smoother and get away with it – others from the hinterlands just appear crasser. It is so terrible to see foreign tourists harassed this way – we seem to have buried the rubric from our tradition.
Even in neighboring Nepal, Bhutan and Sri Lanka, I have seen men behave in a dignified and respectful way towards women.
Growing up, we have been taught to value, cherish, and protect women – but our behavior is quite the opposite, thus very paradoxical. We are the one unique culture that elevates the Mother above Father, Guru and God . My KV school pledge used to have “all Indians are my brothers and sisters”, and we boys used to mutter “except one” at the end! We propitiate many goddesses in ritual, celebrate them in many festivals, seek their blessings in our pursuits of education, wealth, the arts, power and more. Each Indian man knows that his life would be empty and purposeless without women – mothers, sisters, wives, daughters – as it their affection, love and effort that raises and sustains us….yet…..
I will observe that though men from western countries “seem” to be more respectful externally, they do treat women as disposable objects of their fancy and lust – use, throw, and cheat. It is just that western women give it back in kind. So, I would argue the western male’s abuse is more in the private spaces, than public. [I lived in the US for a decade, and hence noting from that experience and long-time social connect]
I think our Indian men have gotten worse – since I have been watching the world – growing up in the 80s in Madras. The pervasive availability of porn on mobile phones, for one, is distorting and wrecking the psyches of young teenage boys across villages and cities – who have all the potential to be respectful cultured men if spared of such terrible content. Same with OTT – both Indian and abroad – which serve copious amounts promiscuity, and goad the young adolescent male towards “sensual pleasure maximization through any means” as the only purpose in life. Add to that all the globalization, crass consumerism and free-flowing drugs and alcohol….and very soon Indian men have become largely de-sensitized to how a girl or woman might feel if treated the way we do.
I have been a liberal all my life but have gravitated more towards the center in my social worldview. I am for individual Rights and freedoms, but Duties towards our fellow humans, society and nature are equally important. Unless some personal freedoms are restricted and severe punishment is enforced (like many you propose), I don’t see the situation changing.
You forgot to add that SIkhs from Punjab save those women