A curious hashtag called ‘marriage strikes’ has appeared in recent days as a response to the Delhi High Court case on marital rape. No, women are not exiting the institution of marriage in this online debate. It is men who are striking marriage for a year as a counter to the court proceedings.
A two-judge bench at the Delhi High Court led by Justice Rajiv Shakdher and C Hari Shankar is hearing petitions challenging the marital status giving immunity to men having non-consensual sex with their wives.
At present, a man having non-consensual sex with his wife who is above 18 years of age, cannot be charged with the laws pertaining to rape. Hence, if a woman says no to sex to her husband and if he sexually abuses her, the man will not be charged with rape (but can be charged with domestic violence and other non-sexual offences). This downplays the woman’s say in sexual intercourse after marriage, which is unconstitutional, the petitioners (women’s rights activists) have argued.
But on Twitter, the debate has become a ‘feminist’ versus ‘save men’ issue.
Some are taking this strike seriously (on social media) – while others are having fun – calling it a ‘win-win’ for the feminist movement.
Men deciding to opt out of marriage if marital rape is criminalised is a huge win-win for the feminist movement. #MarriageStrike
— Siddharth (@DearthOfSid) January 19, 2022
Also read: Divorce isn’t the problem. Staying in bad marriage for the sake of kids is
Who is trending #MarriageStrike?
Men who are trending #MarriageStrike are saying they will not marry at all if more power is given to women in marital relationships. The prime fear is that Indian women will ‘misuse’ the power to falsely implicate men.
According to social media insights provided by online tool TalkWalker app, between 18 and 20 January (till 12pm), more than 66.8 thousand tweets contained the hashtag #MarriageStrike.
The responsibility of the trend has been taken by Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF), a men’s rights advocacy group founded in 2005.
Lawyers and Delhi High Court judges can stop treating men as 2nd class citizens and meet our basic demands, then they can call for any number of laws for women. Till then, it is #MarriageStrike & #MGTOW.
One can freely download this picture and share to people in Twitter. pic.twitter.com/lk6t6aJywZ
— Save Indian Family Foundation (@realsiff) January 20, 2022
By doing so, they are requesting the lawyers at the Delhi High Court to “stop treating men as 2nd class citizens and meet (their) basic demands, then they can call for any number of laws for women”.
The trend set by SIFF talks about the false cases women have drawn against men by using the provisions of cruelty and domestic violence. However, the top tweets gaining attention on Twitter misspell the word ‘consensual sex’ trivialising the whole debate.
A tweet by Ashraf Ansari — no bio on Twitter — posted a picture which said ‘having sex with your own wife is a crime, but your wife having sex with someone else is not’ has gained more than 1,800 likes by the time this story was filed.
Having Sex with your wife is crime but your wife having sex with someone else is not crime. #MarriageStrike pic.twitter.com/Qbhy90i5DF
— Ashraf Ansari (@ashrafnansari) January 18, 2022
A Twitter user named @suprakashkh even changed the cautionary line added at the end of advertisements for mutual funds and stock markets.
Guys !!
How many times I will tell you ?? Now Delhi High Court is talking in my lines.
MARRIAGE & MUTUAL FUNDS ARE SUBJECT TO MARKET RISK.. READ OFFER DOCUMENTS BEFORE SIGNING THE CONTRACT.
Try to misunderstand my words properly !!!#विवाह_बहिष्कार#MarriageStrike @kedianirmal26 pic.twitter.com/ETOA6J6Blp— Star_Father (@suprakashkh) January 18, 2022
A user named Manish Sindwani equated the two, saying — ‘Marital Rape = Marriage Strike’.
#MarritalRape= #MarriageStrike
That's the Tweet
— manish sindwani (@manish_sindwani) January 18, 2022
Amit Lakhani, a men’s rights activist said that due to the fear of being accused of marital rape, many men would not like to get married at all.
When I see #MarriageStrike trending in India the one thing that I make out is that the laws governing marriages which were already lopsided & the way #MaritalRape is now being introduced, there'll be a large section of men who wouldn't want to get married only.
— Amit Lakhani (@TheAmitLakhani) January 19, 2022
Also read: Sober swiping? Sanskaari Indians are ditching matrimonial sites for dating apps
Feminists rejoice
But people in favour of laws governing ‘consensual’ sex in marriage are not opposing the trend #MarriageStrike as they believe that those against consensual sex are the ones boycotting the marriage.
Psychologist Lakshmi Sreenivasan hopes that this strike is never pulled back.
May the #MarriageStrike be never called off, ever!
— UrbanShrink (@UrbanShrink) January 19, 2022
A Twitter user @up16stanaccount said that this is the greatest move Indian men have ever pulled as it exposes the ‘awful institution of marriage’.
The #MarriageStrike is the greatest feminist move Indian men have ever pulled. Not only are you saving lakhs of women from being trapped in abusive households with predators and enablers, you are also making Engels proud and exposing the awful institution of marriage
More power✊— monkë (@UP16stanaccount) January 19, 2022
Comedian Aditi Mittal even asked (we don’t know if sarcastically) — if this trend was a promise or a threat?
Men on #MarriageStrike– is it a threat or a promise?
— Aditi Mittal (@awryaditi) January 19, 2022
Meena Kandasamy, feminist and author, said that men who are trending #MarriageStrike are potential rapists. She questioned why would a self-respecting person not want marital rape to be criminalised?
Men tweeting in favour of #marriagestrike are potential rapists. Possible rapists. Previous rapists. Why would any man who is self-respecting not want for marital rape to be criminalised? How can there be legal protection for rape only becauseit happens in a marriage?
— Dr Meena Kandasamy (is on hiatus) (@meenakandasamy) January 19, 2022
Duncan, a gay man living in the United Kingdom, also wrote about his happiness on how marital rape is criminal in the United Kingdom.
Are men really having a meltdown over proposals in India to make marital rape criminal? It should be criminal. Being married to someone doesn’t give you the right to *rape them*. I am personally very pleased it’s now criminal in the U.K.
— Duncan (@DuncanHenry78) January 19, 2022
Views are personal.