Imagine being married into a fraternity that leaves you anxious every time your partner gets deployed. With every separation, the absence of your spouse not only leaves you emotionally drained but carries you further into the trenches of existential crisis. To fill that void, imagine pursuing a career tailored to suit your unpredictable circumstances and yet getting reviled merely for existing. That is the stark reality of many Army wives today facing the wrath of constant judgments, a barrage of superfluous criticism and resentment for getting married to olive greens.
Recently, ThePrint published an article covering a few Army wives who have embraced the art of creating content as fully fledged careers, carving a niche into the digital world of food, fashion and décor. Pretty much akin to what the usual influencer culture is all about. On the surface, it’s an inspiring story of perseverance and re-invention, something that was celebratory to many. However, the vitriol in the comment section, the scathing remarks under the post coming from both women and men are a testimony to the fact that hatred will dwell in any form and continue to find a fertile ground of envy and insecurity.
Accusations of elitism, usage of perks and privileges to further their content, and leveraging military perks akin to other government jobs are hurled at these women. Irony dies a hundred times when the very themes they showcase are staples of mainstream instagram culture — style, cuisine and travel. Yet when showcased by a woman collaborating with a brand draped in a sari, it suddenly becomes a symbol of provocation.
One particularly disturbing incident involved a woman publicly humiliating a fellow Army spouse and threatening her in a vile manner. The justification? She felt powerless when confronted with being bitter to her own fraternity. This isn’t just toxic, it’s dangerous. Likewise, many famous bloggers have been subjected to wild innuendos and expletives ranging from “gold diggers” and “trophy wives” to “leeches” and whatnot. The question arises: why must a woman pay such a steep, nerve-racking price for simply being part of an organisation and in quest of joys in simple creative pursuits.
Also read: Fauji wife 2.0—Army spouses are turning ‘sarkari ghar’ lifestyle into online careers
What is more astounding is the fact that the majority of this hostility comes from other women. The age-old adage that women bring each other down finds a disturbing validation in every thread, every post that is even remotely related to Army wives. These remarks reek of latent jealousy, inbred insecurity and solely aimed at bringing them down and painting their lives in the hues of disgrace.
It gets worse when they casually get labelled as cheaters, with many people using the age-old sexist Hindi proverb, “Pati fauj mein aur biwi mauj mein”. This mentality highlights the obnoxious mindset of a large section of society that sees women in an ignominious way, no matter how well they strive to do in their lives. Let’s not forget: these fauji wives are already navigating deeply complex personal landscapes — pregnancy, ageing in-laws, frequency of sudden relocations, and the usual heart-breaking phases of separation, sometimes fuelled by nothing but improbability. In this scenario, if some of them choose to channelise their creativity into content creation, without harming anyone while respecting the ethos and guidelines of the organisation, why should they be warranted to such repugnant remarks?
The article published in ThePrint on 1 September 2025 wasn’t a glorification of Army wives or written to put them on a higher pedestal. The spotlight was on how social media can be used as a viable income tool for people who cannot commit to traditional career roles and also as a smart means to utilise their creative instincts. It had nothing to do with entitlement, but rather spoke of adaptability, resilience, and living life on your own terms. Behind every screen is a person — a woman, a mother, a wife — someone who is grappling with abject loneliness, ambiguity and a heavy weight of societal expectations.
So the next time you see a post featuring a sari-clad woman at a party or a travel reel from an unknown location, ask yourself — how does her joy threaten yours? If a chiffon sari soiree can rattle a section of people who just see the often short-lived glamorous side, perhaps the issue isn’t the sari or the pearls — it’s the mirror.
The author is an Army wife who wants to remain anonymous.
Editor’s note: We know the writer well and only allow anonymity when we do so.
Army wives are a highly educated lot. Many of them are lawyers, CAs, engineers and what not. Given how work-from-home is in vogue now, especially since Covid, they can surely pursue very fulfilling careers. Even when circumstances compel them to stay at home, they can have a genuine career.
But to post Insta reels and Tiktok content and try to portray it as a career is just pathetic.
One would have understood if even the reels/shorts were focused on things like house interior decoration or gardening. But they very clearly are not, with only a minority indulging in such serious hobbies. The usual staple is to pose in revealing and skimpy outfits – the more skin, the better. Under the excuse of being a “fashion influencer”, bold and provocative content is created. A desperate pursuit for followers on social media platforms results in competitive sleaziness.
All this just hurts the image of the Indian armed forces. As it is, the jawans and officers stay away from home for extended periods of time. When they know that their wives, back home, are indulging in such “content creation”, it surely does not soothe and calm them. Quite the opposite effect, rather.
Dear Didi/Madam, you should be thankful for your freedom of expressions and your privilige. At least, you got to say your piece on a national media platform. I’m sure if you were not an army wife, this could have been little difficult.
Also, let’s hail democracy and respect other privilige of freedom of expression. It could be harsh, critical, agonizing but it is people right to express on public domains.
No one is attacking an army wife or husband who is choosing not to share their personal life on social media. The whole point of social media content is to garner attention and validation. Of course, it hurts when you get negative attention.
Let’s be honest over here yes it is tough as the jobs of their spouses are in a difficult places. But they still live a better life than majority of the people of this country and let’s not kid ourselves that it isn’t true. Also ask them how do they use the Sahayaks that are provided to them for their own personal chores. The benefits they get from the canteens and the parties they attend? Again, I am not saying that it isn’t tough but it is still better than majority of what people get. Also, I would suggest to stop calling yourself “army wives” and be proud of you can do and can achieve rather than basing your entire personality on it