Goa: Khadeeja holds a vacant expression as she slices up pineapples for an iftar feast in her village. She looks around to make sure no one’s watching before dropping her stillborn foetus into a boiling pot of biryani. It’s Khadeeja’s act of rebellion against her husband, community and the police. As she gets ready to rejoin the feast, a smile appears on her face but the eyes remain expressionless. The Malayalam language film Biriyaani, directed by Sajin Baabu, released in 2020 won the actor — Kani Kusruti — Kerala State Award for Best Actress. It set in motion a journey to the breakout moment she would experience three years later.
In 2024, Kusruti became the person of the hour with her performance in Payal Kapadia’s All We Imagine As Light. And followed it up with a rare role in Shuchi Talati’s Girls Will Be Girls. Now, the recognition is coming from one of the best in trade.
“Shabana Azmi had watched both my films and said she could not believe it was me in both the films,” said Kusruti.
Kusruti has been acting for more than a decade, appearing in brief but impactful roles — a forest officer in Netflix’s Poacher, a femme fatale in Killer Soup. Offscreen, she stands up for her beliefs. In the red-carpet event at Cannes, Kusruti carried a watermelon bag, a symbol of Palestinian solidarity. She has been vocal about the allegations of sexual harassment in the Malayalam film industry. She is everywhere—movie reviews, news reports, interviews, social media.
“I would like to take a long break once this is all done,” she said.
The actor’s schedule is packed with interviews, and she is travelling to film festivals all over. However, she does not know if her life has completely changed yet.
“Maybe I will know it better in retrospect. Right now, it is difficult to understand, because it is still happening.”
Also read: OTT tongue exposed Indians to small Hindustans. Language purity taking backseat
The journey to All We Imagine
Kusruti holding onto the pole of a swaying Mumbai local has been the standout image of All We Imagine. Now, her co-stars wish for more screen time with her.
“Kusruti and I were similar in our struggles with language. She struggled with Hindi and I with English. But we were attuned to each other’s work, and thought on similar lines – If the work of my co-artiste is good, my work will also shine through. I learnt a lot from her, and I would like to work with her over and over again,” said Chhaya Kadam, who plays Parvaty in All We Imagine As Light.
She plays all these serious characters, but she is a goofball and extremely funny in real life.
Shuchi Talati, director
It took nearly a decade for Kusruti to become part of Kapadia’s All We Imagine As Light.
“She reached out after watching Memories of a Machine (2016). She wanted me to play the character of Anu in All We Imagine, and said she had developed it and kept me in mind.”
Anu, who is outgoing and curious about the world, is almost an antithesis to Prabha who is more reserved.
Seven years passed.
“I was much older by then, and said I won’t play Anu. So she asked me to audition for Prabha instead,” said Kusruti. The actor, meanwhile, learnt that Divya Prabha, another Malyalam actor, too had auditioned for the role of Prabha in All We Imagine. “I think at one point, most Malayalam actors had auditioned for Payal’s film.”
Kapadia’s rigorous auditioning worked in favour of the film, the rest has been cinematic history.
When All We Imagine As Light went on floors in 2023, Kusruti had already finished working on Shuchi Talati’s Girls Will Be Girls in 2022. Talati too had been impressed by Kusruti’s work in Memories of a Machine (2016).
“The quality that Kusruti has that made me want to cast her in my film, and what makes her a fine actor is what I call a livewire quality. Watching Kusruti perform, it is unexpected, and you want to lean in, because you do not know what she is going to do next. From her first audition as Anila, it made me almost anxious, what is this mother going to do, and that anxiety she was able to evoke in me was what the character needed,” said Talati.
In Girls Will Be Girls, Kusruti plays Anila, a single mother of a teenager battling loneliness. The character tries reliving her own life as a school kid of a strict boarding school in the Himalayas.
“I did not understand her character at all, and I actually sat down to voice my ideas and concerns to Shuchi. But it was her clarity of vision that eventually helped me. And when Preeti, who plays Mira, came on board, and we started rehearsals, that’s when Anila’s responses and behavior made sense,” said Kusruti.
Kusruti’s expressive eyes stand out in her performances. In Girls Will Be Girls, when her character receives a frantic call from Mira to rescue her, Anila comes rushing. In that scene, Kusruti’s expression switches from concern to anger at the principal’s comment about Mira’s ‘questionable’ behaviour with Sri. In another, she smiles indulgently, as Mira sits in front of a mirror, and soon starts dancing to a song. Kusruti joins in, smiling before abruptly leaving, her shoulders tensed.
“Kani’s eyes in this film deserve an essay all their own,” wrote senior film critic Anna M Vetticad in her review of All We Imagine As Light.
“There is a moment when her character enacts an imaginary scene in All We Imagine As Light and right after that, there is a shine in her eyes. That is the extent to which her performance shines through,” said Maitreyee K, Kusruti friend of two decades. Maitreyee is a psychologist.
What unites Anila and Prabha in All We Imagine are their profound loneliness despite being married at some point. But that is where the similarity ends.
Kusruti received DMs from women about both the characters, telling her that they either recognize themselves in the characters, or they know of people like them. But the actor reserves credit for her directors.
“I have a sense that my directors are very strong authors, I like to work with the director so that I interpret the character how they would like me to. I would ideally like to have 3-5 days before shooting to understand and get into the character,” said Kusruti.
“She plays all these serious characters, but she is a goofball and extremely funny in real life,” said Shuchi Talati. Tight deadlines don’t stop her from cracking jokes.
Kusruti means mischievous and I felt it suited me. Ever since, whenever I went to a government office, and they read my name, they would always laugh and be curious, if that is really my name, or if I am really mischievous. I like that it’s a source of laughter.
Kani Kusruti
Apart from acting, it’s the mundane act of cleaning that the actor finds indulging.
Also read: Serendipity Arts Festival is inviting Panaji, its people to co-author a new cultural chronicle
Real impacts reel
In 2021 year, Kusruti sent a message to the Kerala film industry by dedicating her award for Biriyaani to PK Rosy—a Dalit actor who was pushed out of the industry for playing an upper caste Nair woman in Vigathakumaran (1928).
The All We Imagine actor had also spoken about how she had been approached by filmmakers in the Malayalam film industry seeking sexual favours. That meant fewer projects for the actor who had started out with drama horror anthology Kerala Cafe in 2009.
“I really don’t care if I can act in a film or not. Maybe my guts have come from that, and it’s a privilege. But that is not how it should be. For many, it is their only passion, acting should be a safe place,” said Kusruti.
But she does not see herself as an activist–it is more the way she has been brought up, and looks at life. Kusruti, who studied in a government school, loves the writings by Vaikom Muhammad Basheer and K Saraswathi Amma.
Just because the director is female, it does not mean it has no male gaze. There is, despite the directors trying their best to not have at. But as an artist, I can see there are moments. I feel it is more of a practice to erase it completely.
Kani Kusruti
Biriyaani was the first full-length role that worked out for Kusruti, from all the acting offers she had received back then.
The movie looks at the impact of young men joining the Islamic State on their families. In fact, the missing youth appears only in news reports, not as a character. Khadeeja (Kusruti) is the sister of one such missing man. She is in a loveless marriage to an older man within a conservative society. And her brother’s disappearance has left their mother mentally unstable. The news of disappearance also leads to Khadeeja’s social ostracism. The character’s life appears to be a constant shift from one hopeless situation to the next.
Kusruti, however, felt distant from some of the decisions Khadeeja took. And that includes her method of revenge that comes at the end of the movie. Kani’s reason for taking the role was more pragmatic.
“In an ideal situation, I would think I want to be part of a story. But most times, that doesn’t work. Biriyaani was a full-length role, and I wanted to see if I can pull off the graph of the character,” said Kusruti.
Kusruti was also aware of the male gaze in the director’s vision when she took on the role. But she does not think it is a matter of his gender.
“Just because the director is female, it does not mean it has no male gaze. There is, despite the directors trying their best to not have at. But as an artist, I can see there are moments. I feel it is more of a practice to erase it completely,” said Kusruti, about Kapadia and Talati’s films.
Also read: Small-town India gets a new movie experience. Inflatable cinema halls with Dolby, recliners
‘A team player’
On the last day of shooting for Girls Will Be Girls, the team was behind schedule and still had an important scene to finish. Kusruti became almost like an additional assistant director, prompting the younger actors to be ready with their cues and props, thus blurring the lines between cast and crew.
“I think the experience of having worked extensively across mediums, including theater, has made Kani the actor she is and a team player,” said Talati.
Her first brush with acting came in school when she was in class XII. Raghuthaman, director of the Thiruvananthapuram-based theatre group Abhinaya, was doing a contemporary Malayalam adaptation of the 7th century Sanskrit farce Bhagavadajjukam, and offered her a role. As a child, she loved watching movies and Urvashi has been her favourite ever since she was a child.
“I remember fighting with a girl on the school bus when I was 5, she said she liked Shobhana better. Urvashi is just brilliant,” said Kusruti. Both are popular award-winning Malayalam actors, who were at their peak in 80s and 90s.
At first, she was hesitant and it took some encouragement from the parents. Kusruti has since acted in street theatres, stage productions, travelling theatre, web series and movies. She also studied theatre at L’École Internationale de Théâtre Jacques Lecoq in Paris.
Also read: Sanskrit to satellites, embassies in Delhi are using culture to show ties, get close to India
Activism, upbringing, Cannes
The actor was born to social activists and rationalists Maitreyan and Jayasree AK, who never married, and they raised their daughter to have complete intellectual independence.
“My father is an atheist and mother is spiritual. They encouraged me to think, but they never forced me to think in a particular way. For a while, I was fascinated by the church and was a believer,” said Kusruti.
The actor acknowledges her privilege, of being part of a family that has been unconventional and empowering.
“I remember that her parents came to the camp where we had first met. They were sitting and talking, and the impression I got was they were more like friends, discussing everything,” said Maitreyee K.
A few years ago, Kusruti had also shared the letter on social media her father had written to her when she turned 18. In the letter, he talked about the rights she would have as an individual, with words of encouragement, recognising her as an independent individual. He also encouraged her not to worry about public opinion but follow her heart and nurture love and compassion for herself and fellow beings.
“I have no inhibitions, and do not have a lot of baggage of social pressure or what people will think. A lot of my co-actors go through a lot of things before shooting for intimate scenes. For me, there are no such thoughts,” said Kusruti.
Kusruti’s name has a story of its own. Her parents did not want her to have a last name that would signify caste and religion. Her mother had a long-drawn argument with her school authorities over it. Exhausted, the school authorities gave in, but insisted on Kusruti having a second name.
“My mother just wanted to get it over with, and said ‘K’—which is also the first letter of my name. So my registered name was Kani K,” said the actor.
While filling out forms for her Class X boards, she was asked to expand on what K meant in her name. She came back home and asked her parents what it stood for, and they had funny suggestions, including the Malayalam word kalli — which means a liar. Finally, she zeroed in on Kusruti.
“Kusruti means mischievous and I felt it suited me. Ever since, whenever I went to a government office, and they read my name, they would always laugh and be curious, if that is really my name, or if I am really mischievous. I like that it’s a source of laughter,” said Kusruti, smiling.
She has called her father by his name since she could speak. However she calls her mother Jayashree Chechi, which means sister in Malayalam. It so happened after Kusruti heard someone else calling her chechi, and it stuck, and no one corrected her.
“I never had any piercings, and I was asked if I was a Pentecost. But I was never bullied over it,” said Kusruti.
She was also sent to gender sexuality workshops by her parents. Kusruti had her first sex education discussion when she was 7, and her parents explained everything from how babies are born to child sexual abuse. People who identified as queer, and HIV positive would often come to live with the family, and it was a community that also welcomed everyone, and Maitreyee too felt included when she went to visit their home.
“I think her house in Goa now is how her own home was so many years ago, in the form of a community, with care and respect for each other,” said Maitreyee. Kusruti cannot imagine herself living in a city, and she was miserable the two years she lived in the bustling city of Mumbai.
Outside her green double storey duplex stand a bougainvillea tree in beautiful pink, a lemon tree and two parijat trees.
Kusruti begins her day by taking a stroll around the house.
“This place, with its greenery, reminds me of the 90s Kerala where I grew up,” said Kusruti. She works out two hours a day, and practices the sitar. When she finds time, she tries reading non-fiction books on various subjects, from philosophy to science.
Also read: India’s digital nomads fleeing big cities for work-bliss balance. New hubs want them, woo them
It’s not just a red carpet
Kusruti is not flooded with offers, nor has her life changed dramatically in 2024. Her criteria for choosing a role remain the same. The story and narrative she can become part of—that is what interests her. But reviewers have mentioned almost consistently that they wished there was more of her on screen.
At a time when social media is a source of revenue for actors, Kusruti’s profile clearly states that she will not do paid publicity.
“When I started my page, it was about a personal space to share thoughts, or recommendations of innovations I liked. I just do not think I am the kind of creator that is needed to use social media for a certain kind of content,” she said.
But she makes her presence known in real life. When the cast flew to France for Cannes, social media was rife with discussion and debates on the ongoing Israel-Palestine conflict. Kusruti, who was to make her appearance with the rest of the cast, decided to make use of the occasion to make a political statement with her sartorial choice. Along with her designer, she zeroed in on carrying a purse in the shape of a watermelon, to register her solidarity with Palestine. When cut open, the fruit holds the colours of the Palestinian flag—red, black, white, and green.
“I just wanted to be reminded that it is part of me. Solidarity to Palestine. I carried it along with me.”
(Edited by Anurag Chaubey)
All We Imagine is just a lot of hype and little substance.
Had great expectations while watching it. But found out that it’s just another woke production. Probably the reason why it was so well received at these film festivals is because the Left-liberal wokies are the ones usually in charge of these festivals.
Watched the film. Typical liberal-Left narrative romanticising woke ideas of the world and relationships.
No wonder the film got such rapturous reception at the film festivals around the world. After all, these film festivals are organised by the same woke brigade and it’s always a I-scratch-your-back-and-you-scratch-mine group.
Islam has a solution for this all pervasive problem.
It cancels the problem of “male gaze” with the burqa. Once a woman accepts the burqa, the male gaze doesn’t bother her any more.
What’s the use of staring at a woman in a burqa? Who knows, it might even be a man inside the burqa.